By Sean Boelman
Heading into 2025, many people are deciding on their New Year’s resolutions to better themselves. However, it is essential to note that becoming the best version of yourself doesn’t require significant changes — it just requires you to embrace your true self and be unapologetically you.
Empowering Others to Live More Authentically
This is precisely what Victoria Ryder, a mental health advocate and founder of Violently Peaceful, teaches. As a public health professional with a Master’s degree and in pursuit of a doctorate, Ryder strives to inspire others to embrace their true selves and foster resilience in the face of challenges. By doing so, she can amplify important conversations about mental health and personal growth and positively impact lives and communities.
“My story started when I realized that no matter what has happened to someone on their life path, they can change and become their authentic selves,” Ryder explains. “I was tired of the internalized shame; I was tired of picking out which mask I would wear to hide myself; I was tired of not feeling worthy enough to take up space here. Today, my life is authentic, unapologetic, and boundless. ”
Ryder formed her website Violently Peaceful to help teach the style of authentic living that she practices in her everyday life. “We are all one. We are here to learn. We are here to expand. We are here to love each other. We are here to become violently peaceful,” her website says. This is the philosophy with which she lives and teaches others to do so to help them maximize their success.
Through Violently Peaceful, Ryder releases a series of podcasts exclusively on YouTube titled “Zero Podcasts,” in which she shares her insight and experiences. Topics she discusses include “It’s time to love and accept yourself unconditionally” and “It’s time to stop caring what other people think about you and start living authentically.” These videos epitomize Ryder’s mission to pass on the wisdom and guidance that helped her become authentic so that others can find their peace.
How to Live as Your Authentic Self
In one of her most recent videos, Ryder shares thoughts on discovering authenticity, emphasizing the value of being around people who embrace their true selves. She suggests learning from those who inspire you while staying true to your identity.
Sometimes, places like the internet can be a great place to find confident, authentic people for inspiration. The simple act of watching someone confident can allow confidence to rub off on you. For Ryder, this meant finding fashion influencers online since fashion is how she expresses herself and feels confident. However, your inspiration can come from whatever your interests are — athletes, entrepreneurs, or anyone authentic to who they are.“Have people that motivate you, even if you don’t know them,” Ryder asserts. “It can be so beautiful to experience someone who may have gone through similar struggles in life where authenticity wasn’t available to them, and they created a path for themselves and success out of that path. I think there’s nothing more beautiful than that.”
Ryder’s other step is to eliminate toxic people from your life. She explains that, more often than not, people who express negativity about embracing your true self just envy you for being so comfortable with yourself. Although you can’t control others’ behaviors or opinions, you can change how much time of day you give them. Negative people don’t have to be a big part of your life.
But cutting negativity out of your life can be easier said than done — especially when that negativity comes from those closest to you. Of course, you should choose peace and love, not violence. Don’t counter negativity with negativity; it will only make everyone feel worse. Building a circle of people around you that support you in your quest to live authentically takes patience and time, but the investment you make is worth it.
“At the end of the day, you deserve to be yourself,” concludes Ryder. “I think that this world needs more authenticity, and for the world to change, we must be authentic. Everyone judged all the people who invented monumental things. They looked at those people and thought they were crazy. But all those people tapped into their authentic selves to make those things happen, making society grow and transform. People who are stuck and cannot be themselves truly do not do anything major in this life. To make this world better, you must be authentic.”
Published by Joseph T.
