Women's Journal

Menu

Feminism, Fertility, and the Unspoken Realities of Motherhood

Women's Journal Staff on September 3, 2025

By: Cheri Bergeron

Thanks to the hard work of the feminists who came before me, I was raised to believe I could be anything. And I believed it.

I chased degrees, promotions, and adventure. I bought real estate.  Moved cross country. I traveled solo. I built a life I was proud of. And throughout it all, I held tightly to the idea that motherhood would happen “someday”—when I was ready. When I found the right partner. When I was prepared to settle down. When the timing was perfect.

Because that’s what I had been told: Motherhood can wait.  You have time.

It was a promise that felt empowering. And for many women, it was. The feminist movement opened doors that our grandmothers never walked through—doors to financial autonomy, professional possibilities, sexual expression, and the idea that motherhood is a choice, not a predetermined destiny.

But somewhere along the way, many of us misunderstood that promise. We believed having it all meant having it whenever we want. And when it came to fertility, we thought biology would be as flexible as our ambition.

It wasn’t.

When Time Becomes the Enemy

In my mid-30s, as I watched friends marry and start families, I waited patiently for my turn. I believed in the fairytale. I kissed a lot of frogs and even married a couple of them. And when that Cinderella story didn’t turn out the way I planned, I tried to force it—with the wrong person because my biological clock was ticking at a deafening pitch. But unlike the fairytale, the baby didn’t magically arrive.

By 40, I was no longer hoping for a baby “someday”—I was desperately hoping for a chance. I was suddenly facing a truth I hadn’t been prepared for: fertility has a timeline, even when everything else doesn’t.

I’ll never forget sitting in the fertility clinic for the first time, staring at a laminated graph the doctor slid across the table. It showed the steep drop in a woman’s fertility after 35, and an even sharper decline at 40. The image was clinical, matter-of-fact—just a line curving downward—but to me, it felt like a cliff. A quiet panic settled in. Why hadn’t I seen this graph ten years earlier? Why hadn’t anyone told me this wasn’t just a personal choice—it was a biological time bomb?  When had I missed the memo?

Feminism, Fertility, and The Unspoken Realities of Motherhood

Photo Courtesy: National Center of Chronic Disease Prevention and Health Promotion (Division of Reproductive Health)

I spent the next decade navigating a complex, emotional, and often isolating journey through IVF, donor conception, and ultimately, single motherhood by choice.

It wasn’t the fairytale I imagined. It was something braver.

What We Can Learn From Feminism

This isn’t an indictment of feminism.  I am deeply grateful for what it gave me, coupled with a gentle reckoning of what it didn’t warn me about. Feminism gave me freedom. But it didn’t always give me the whole picture about motherhood.

We can—and should—support women in building careers, living fully, and making intentional choices. But we also need to equip them with the truth about their biology, the realities of fertility, and the full spectrum of options available to them. Egg freezing. IVF. Donor paths. Solo parenthood.

Not because they must take those routes—but because they deserve to know they exist.

A New Kind of Empowerment

In my book, Mission: Motherhood, I share my unconventional journey to motherhood not to prescribe a path, but to open the conversation. Because the longer we keep fertility behind closed doors, the more women will find themselves blindsided by choices they never knew they had to make.

It’s time to update the narrative. To tell the next generation of women: Yes, you can be anything. But if motherhood matters to you, don’t leave it on the back burner.

Let’s stop telling women they have plenty of time and start giving them the tools to decide for themselves.  Let’s make conversations about egg freezing, IVF, and solo motherhood as normal as career planning or dating advice.

Because if motherhood is part of your purpose, you deserve more than empty promises. You deserve the facts—and a path forward.

 

Disclaimer: The information shared in this article is based on the author’s personal experiences and reflections. It is not intended to serve as medical advice. Fertility and reproductive health are complex and individual, and results may vary. Always consult with a healthcare professional or fertility specialist for advice tailored to your unique circumstances. This article does not endorse any specific products, services, or treatment options, and any references to third-party services are purely informational.

Becky Bronson on Ghosts, Finding One’s Voice, and Writing What Keeps You Up at Night

Women's Journal Staff on September 3, 2025

By: Clara Whitmore

Becky Bronson’s fiction doesn’t just tell stories—it interrogates the fragile places where personal struggle, social change, and human connection meet. Her latest novel, Ghosts, marks a bold turn in her career. While her first two books, When North Becomes South and Trapped in Pairadice, drew directly from lived experiences, Ghosts arrived in a way Bronson still calls “a little crazy”: the character demanded to be written.

What began as an afterthought in her second book grew into a voice that wouldn’t let her rest. “That character began talking to me after I completed the book and told me I had to write her story and it was to be about gun violence,” Bronson says. At first, she resisted, but the scenes kept coming. Six months later, she realized she was holding the bones of a new novel—one that would take her into uncharted territory.

Writing From Inspiration and Resistance

Bronson is no stranger to using fiction as a response to the world around her. Her debut, When North Becomes South, emerged from her son’s Peace Corps experience in an off-the-grid African village, where she and her husband saw firsthand how people lived without conveniences most Westerners take for granted. That trip planted the seed for a novel about society’s dependence on technology.

Her second novel, Trapped in Pairadice, came from witnessing a close friend’s destructive struggle with online gambling. “I wanted to write some kind of exposé as to how online gambling corporations were exploiting vulnerable people,” she explains.

But Ghosts was different. It wasn’t planned—it insisted. Though the book deals with gun violence, Bronson emphasizes that its true core is about human connection, friendship, and finding one’s voice.

Protecting Creative Space

Balancing creativity with daily responsibilities is a challenge many women face, and Bronson is candid about how she manages it. Her writing unfolds in stages she calls “create mode” and “writing mode.”

“When I get an idea, I’m on call 24/7,” she says. Ideas may strike in the middle of the night or while walking her dog, and she keeps tools nearby to capture them. Once she’s committed to drafting, mornings become sacred. From 9 a.m. to noon, she sets aside uninterrupted hours to focus. Protecting this routine requires discipline and boundaries, but Bronson has learned that honoring her schedule is the only way to sustain momentum.

Becoming a “Real Author”

Having published multiple novels, Bronson admits her identity as a writer has evolved. “I’m starting to feel like a ‘real author’ now, but I’ve had many other identities in my life, and this is simply one more,” she reflects. Writing, for her, is not about permanence but about embracing yet another chapter in a multifaceted life.

While she has several projects in early stages, she hasn’t yet found the idea compelling enough to commit fully. Still, she describes herself as someone who writes what keeps her awake at night—a promise that ensures future stories will remain timely and urgent.

Staying Honest in Vulnerability

Ghosts doesn’t shy away from grief or vulnerability. For Bronson, that honesty was essential. “I really wanted it to be about finding one’s voice. That was the over-arching theme for me,” she says. Staying emotionally honest meant confronting her own biases, especially around firearms. Researching guns forced her to walk a careful line: she didn’t want to be perceived as fully anti-gun, yet she needed to tell the story truthfully.

The process was both demanding and liberating. It required Bronson to refine her voice alongside her character’s, shaping a narrative that reflected complexity rather than a single perspective.

Advice for Women Writers

For women who feel a story stirring inside them but doubt whether anyone wants to hear it, Bronson’s advice is direct: write anyway. “If you have the inclination to write, then just do it!” she urges. She admits that vulnerability creeps in when the decision to publish arrives, but stresses that the act of writing itself should be free from fear of reception.

Support is key, she adds. “The thing that helped me most was joining a writer’s support group. If you can find a group of other writers who are non-judgmental and willing to share their experiences, that can be super helpful.”

What Comes Next

Looking ahead, Bronson is drawn to questions of truth and storytelling in the modern era. She’s particularly interested in the decline of local news, the fragility of journalism, and the increasing dominance of artificial intelligence. “Sometimes, when I read a news report, I feel like truth is stranger than fiction in our world today,” she notes. “If I were to write about current events as they are happening, no one would believe it to be true.”

Her next novel, she hints, will likely grapple with these concerns—continuing her pattern of weaving fiction from the threads of what unsettles her most.

Writing What Matters

Through three books, Becky Bronson has charted a course defined not by genre conventions but by courage. Whether drawing from family experiences, social crises, or voices that seem to rise unbidden from her imagination, she writes what presses most urgently on her heart.

With Ghosts, she not only tells the story of a journalist haunted by loss but also models the very journey she hopes readers will take: finding one’s voice, even when it trembles, and using it to speak truth into a complicated world.

Rachel Ann on Writing Your First Book: Mindset, Mistakes, and the Power of Accountability

Women's Journal Staff on September 3, 2025

For anyone considering writing their first book, the process can feel simultaneously exhilarating and overwhelming. Rachel Ann, author and writing mentor, has guided countless first-time authors through the maze of creation, editing, and publishing. Her advice goes beyond practical tips—it addresses the mindset shifts necessary to succeed and the common pitfalls that can derail even the most inspired writer.

Owning Your Voice Before Choosing a Path

One of the first hurdles for new authors is deciding between self-publishing and going with a traditional publisher. Rachel Ann says the choice often requires a fundamental mindset shift. “The biggest shift is realizing the decision isn’t about validation—it’s about control,” she explains.

Too often, first-time authors assume that a publisher’s stamp is a measure of success. But, as Rachel Ann points out, the ultimate impact of a book isn’t determined by a logo on the cover—it’s determined by the effort invested in marketing, audience-building, and consistency. Self-publishing offers speed and autonomy, while traditional publishing provides structure and perceived credibility. “Stop asking ‘who’s going to let me?’ and start asking ‘what’s the path that lets me own my voice and my timeline?’” she advises.

This perspective reframes the publishing journey. Instead of chasing external approval, authors focus on strategies that let them create on their terms while connecting meaningfully with readers.

Common First-Time Author Mistakes

Rachel Ann sees recurring mistakes among first-time writers, often stemming from impatience. “They confuse finishing a draft with being ready to publish,” she says. Rushing leads to weak structure, typos, and the absence of a launch strategy—a scenario she likens to sprinting to 16,000 feet on Everest without oxygen.

The solution, according to Rachel Ann, is to slow down enough to respect the process. Ruthless editing, seeking honest feedback, and developing a launch plan are all critical. Publishing is more than hitting ‘upload’—it’s ensuring your book is positioned to reach the right audience and make the impact you envision.

Setting Priorities for a Successful Launch

For authors aiming to publish by the end of 2025, Rachel Ann emphasizes clarity and consistency. Within the next 90 days, she advises focusing on three priorities:

  1. Define your book’s purpose – Know who your book is for and why it matters. Without this clarity, motivation wanes and progress stalls.
  2. Commit to a writing rhythm – Whether through daily word counts or blocked time, consistency trumps inspiration. The habit of writing consistently creates momentum that carries a project to completion.
  3. Build accountability early – Whether it’s a trusted friend, a writing group, or a coach, having someone to hold you accountable ensures you don’t drift off course. Waiting until 20,000 words in to find your discipline is far too late.

Rachel Ann likens accountability to the difference between intention and impact. “Everyone says they want to write a book. Most never finish because there’s no one in their corner pushing them past the messy middle,” she explains. Her upcoming October small-group program and accountability system are designed to change that. Participants not only learn structure but report progress, receive one-on-one check-ins, and gain momentum from a group climbing the same “mountain” together. Accountability, she asserts, makes reaching the finish line inevitable.

Craft and Community: The Foundations of Long-Term Success

Rachel Ann stresses that finishing a book isn’t just about discipline—it’s about investing in craft and community. Craft ensures the story resonates, while community ensures it reaches readers. “People don’t just buy books—they buy into authors,” she says. Sharing your process early, engaging with potential readers, and building a platform before publication are all essential steps.

By combining dedication to craft with active community-building, authors not only publish a book—they create a foundation for sustained success, establishing a platform that supports future projects. This dual focus, she believes, separates authors who finish from those who falter after the first draft.

Beyond Writing: A Mindset for Lifelong Creativity

For Rachel Ann, writing a first book is as much about personal growth as it is about publishing. “The mindset you adopt as a first-time author often sets the trajectory for your entire writing life,” she notes. Seeing yourself as a creator in control, willing to slow down, learn, and engage with others, empowers writers to navigate the challenges of publishing while preserving their voice.

Her guidance underscores an essential truth: every first-time author will face obstacles, but those obstacles can be anticipated and managed. By focusing on control over validation, cultivating a consistent writing practice, embracing accountability, and investing in both craft and community, writers can transform a daunting project into a completed, impactful book.

Practical Wisdom Wrapped in Encouragement

Rachel Ann’s approach blends practical strategies with motivational clarity. She reminds writers that finishing a book isn’t a solitary accomplishment—it’s a process shaped by mindset, preparation, and support. Each stage—from drafting to editing to launching—is an opportunity to learn and grow, both as a storyteller and as a professional.

For aspiring authors standing at the threshold of their first book, Rachel Ann’s advice is empowering: own your voice, respect the process, and seek the support that will push you through the inevitable challenges. With focus, rhythm, and accountability, writing a first book is less a leap of faith and more a carefully charted climb—one where success is determined by persistence, preparation, and purpose.