“Having It All” —Here’s How Women Can Redefine Success on Their Terms According to Relationship and Life Coach Michelle Shahbazyan
By: Taylor Graveline
Finding that sweet spot between a job you love and a meaningful relationship can sometimes seem like a big goal to chase. It can feel like a lot when trying to meet deadlines, manage family affairs, and still make time for your partner. That pressure to be everything for everyone can wear you out fast.
It doesn’t have to feel like this. According to Michelle Shahbazyan, a renowned relationship and life coach, it is possible to have both—a career that lights you up and a relationship that supports and uplifts you. A little secret starts with redefining what “having it all” means.
The Trap of Doing It All
So many women face this constant pressure to excel at everything they do. It can be tiring to juggle being the boss at work, the planner at home, and the emotional support in your relationships while trying to carve out some time for yourself. A recent study revealed that women are twice as likely as men to take on additional responsibilities outside their official roles, like mentoring and organizing events. When you throw in emotional labor and household chores, it’s no wonder burnout feels like it’s just around the corner.
“Women often give and give without ever refueling themselves,” says Michelle Shahbazyan. “They take on too much, thinking they must do everything perfectly. But that’s not sustainable.”
Shahbazyan encourages you to surround yourself with people who uplift and energize you to break this cycle. Whether it’s a friend who inspires you to rest or a partner who helps you stay focused on your goals, the right support system is essential. “Choose positivity and connection,” she advises. “It changes how you show up in every area of your life.”
Talking About Your Career Goals Without Guilt
Talking about your career goals with your partner can be nerve-wracking, especially when it might mean spending less time at home or shifting responsibilities. These times require a higher level of open communication to find that balance we all need. A few studies reveal that women (gender) believe traditional gender roles are a barrier to their careers, often due to concerns about causing tension at home.
Instead of avoiding the conversation, Shahbazyan recommends approaching it as a team effort. “Before talking to your partner, get clear about what you want,” she says. “Are you aiming for a promotion? Do you want more flexibility? When you know your priorities, you can communicate them with confidence.”
She also highlights the importance of listening to your partner’s perspective. “Your partner’s expectations may differ from yours, and that’s okay. The goal is to collaborate, not compete. When you treat these discussions as opportunities to grow together, you’ll often find solutions that work for both of you.”
What Balance Looks Like
Forget the idea that you must divide your time equally between work and personal life to achieve balance. Real balance means finding what nourishes you in both areas—without guilt or overwhelm. Shahbazyan puts it simply: “Peace at home brings strength and confidence. With the right partner, everything becomes easier.”
People in supportive relationships are more likely to advance in their careers. A partner who cheers you on and helps share the load makes it possible to aim higher at work without feeling like your personal life is falling apart.
But balance doesn’t just come from your partner. It’s also about setting realistic expectations with yourself. You can only do so much; that’s the truth—and that’s okay. Setting boundaries at work and home helps protect your time and energy so you can show up fully where it matters most. Shahbazyan suggests small but impactful changes, like outsourcing household tasks when possible or creating precise “work-free” hours to connect with loved ones. “Many women contribute financially to their households,” she says. “Using some of that income to ease daily burdens is a smart investment—not something to feel guilty about.”
She also emphasizes the importance of rest and recovery. “When you focus on rest, you’ll have the energy and clarity to pursue your goals without resentment or guilt,” she explains. “And when you’re at your best, everyone benefits.”
Quiet reflection is also a powerful tool. Taking a few weekly moments to pause and reassess your priorities can help you align with what matters. “As you understand yourself better, you’ll naturally let go of the unrealistic expectations weighing you down,” Shahbazyan shares.
Redefining “Having It All”
Balancing your career and personal life isn’t about striving for an ideal state. All you have to do is create a life that nourishes you, and you can pursue your ambitions without sacrificing the relationships that mean the world to you. That journey starts with honest communication, realistic expectations, and boundaries that protect your energy.
As Shahbazyan puts it: “When you create harmony within yourself, it ripples outward—uplifting your career, relationships, and beyond.”
Published by Mark V.
